Thoughts on returning to America

1. Indian cockroaches keep crawling out of my clothing. I hope this doesn't get me in trouble with US Immigration; they already confiscated my British apple.

2. Virginia apples are so delicious.

3. Dear Old Navy: Thank you for saying that long tops and bright colors are in style. I just might survive here if you would only turn off your AC.

4. I am cold.

5. Dear exercise-obsessed people at Gold's Gym: maybe you should take up rice farming.

6. Dear Silver Honda Civic: I am so sorry I was ever embarrassed about the big ol' dent in your door. I have realized how nice you really are. And I can't remember the last time I was in a car without ten other people.

7. Would it be totally innapropriate to walk around town in a sari?

8. I can call people without having to calculate the time difference!

9. I am in love with thirty people on the other side of the world.

10. I think about them fifty times a day.

11. I'm not who I was.